Polygraph Examiners: Let's Have Some Fun and Win Some Prizes Doing It!!Most of our jobs require a certain level of seriousness day in and day out. Sure we cut loose together a couple of times a year at Seminars, but as a community of polygraphers, I feel we need a few more chances to simply laugh together.
So grab yourself a virtual cocktail (or a real one if you choose) and let me tell you about the all new 'YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK' Competition which starts today and ends on October 31st, which is a Saturday, which is also
Halloween, which is also my
Bride's Birthday.
(Feel Free to wish Nadine a Happy Birthday on that day...she'll love it. nadine@polygraphplace.com)
***** Tangent Alert ******* The next section is a personal tangent about rednecks and my hometown that actually has nothing to do with the competition, however I enjoyed tremendously the truth and irony while putting it together so I'm leaving it in. If you aren't in the mood or are in a hurry, just skip on down to the competition rules and prizes ***** End Tangent Alert *******
[Redneck backdrop/disclaimer] - Why did I choose rednecks for this fun competition? Because, although you may not know it to look at me, I was raised a Redneck. I grew up in the city of
Trenton, Georgia, which is the county seat of
Dade County Georgia, A.K.A
Redneck Central. Because of this, I feel a certain degree of latitude to poke fun as a small concession for having to live there. Not to mention the little known fact that real rednecks are proud to
be rednecks and will laugh uncontrollably
at redneck jokes until they spray beer out their nose or swallow too much 'baccy juice', whichever comes first.
In case you think I'm not being truthful about Trenton and Dade County, Georgia, here are a few historical tidbits about my home town that I usually don't admit to.
1. Dade County was the only county to attempt seceding from the Union
AND the State of Georgia, declaring themselves 'The State of Dade' in 1860. Although Georgia did not recognize this secession, the State of Dade maintained its stubborn independence until officially 're-joining' Georgia in 1947.
(Rednecks overreact because they know that they are right even when they aren't)2. In celebration and remembrance of becoming the independent State of Dade, there is a
'Dade Days' Celebration every year in the Trenton Town Square. I remember singing
'We are the World, we are the children' in the town square when I was 16 years old. I sincerely hope no one has pictures or video.
(Rednecks often celebrate their own lack of awareness)3. Dade County is located in the very Northwest Corner of the state and is cut off from the rest of Georgia by Lookout Mountain. Until 1948, there was no way to reach Dade County except to go around the mountain and re-enter GA through Alabama or Tennessee.
(Rednecks enjoy isolation)4. The
654 mile
'Longest Yard Sale in The World' runs every year from Ohio.... right through Dade County GA ... and ends in Alabama.
(Rednecks prepare for this Yard Sale all year long by putting broken appliances, cars and tractor equipment in the front yard as early bird 'advertising'.)5. Whoever designed the State of Georgia Quarter (.25 cent piece) apparently understood that Dade County was Redneck Central and decided to leave the county out of the design altogether.
(Shhh, don't tell anyone from Dade County about this or they may just decide to secede again.)
Accident? I don't think so. Hopefully I've provided enough backdrop to explain my choice in stereotypes for this competition. Now to the actual competition...
-----------YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK COMPETITION RULES------------
What is it? - The competition combines a redneck picture scavenger hunt with the creation of your very own
'You Might Be a Redneck' one liner. These one liners should be done in the same style made famous by Comedian Jeff Foxworthy. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, just google Jeff Foxworthy and you'll get the idea.
Where is it? - The competition will be in the
Examiner's Only Private Forum under a New Topic I just created called
'You Might Be a Redneck' Competition.Who can participate? Any legitimate examiner. If you are a legitimate examiner and have never registered and been approved for the
Examiner's Only Private Forum, then you will need to
follow these directions to do so. (Read Carefully where it says 'Registration is a three step process'.)When does it begin and end? It started the moment this was posted on the blog and will end at Midnight on Halloween, October 31st.
(Don't forget to wish Nadine a Happy Birthday)What are the Ground Rules?- Each Participant may submit up to five entries.
- An entry is a 'You might be a Redneck' one-liner followed by a Redneck picture to match.
- There is no one with access to the private forum who is under 18 so semi-tasteless pictures are encouraged (I mean come on, we are talking rednecks here). HOWEVER!! No nudity please. Semi-revealing for the sake of the joke is okay, just use good judgment...unless you are a redneck. If you are a redneck, your rule is no pictures of anyone wearing less clothing than you would wear to your own wedding ceremony... that should still leave you numerous options.
- Any picture can only be included twice in the overall competition. That means only the first two people to post an identical picture (even though your one-liner might be different) are allowed. Person number three is out of luck, so get on this competition quickly. Don't worry, there are plenty of pictures out there.
- Any redneck willing to submit their own personal, verifiable 'this is really me or mine' in their redneck picture will receive a bonus on their final score.
- Enjoy yourself. Life should not be all work. Take a few minutes to laugh and connect with our polygraph community.
How will entries be judged? The entries will scored by how well you can make the judges laugh and say out loud,
"I don't care who you are, that's just funny" .
What does an entry look like? I'm glad you asked. Below is my sample entry...If you play horse-shoes with your own Bemis Commercial toilet seat....
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You Might Be a Redneck!
So what are the Prizes? Real Prizes will be awarded to the author's of the top three entries as shown below.
That's it. There's nothing left to tell you except 'Git R Dun'
Examiner's Only Private Forum
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